Top 11 Self-Reflection Questions for Years End by brightmichelle

Well, let me tell you about these questions and their value.  Try to answer them and you will soon find RESISTANCE screaming so loud that you can't hear another sound ANYWHERE!  I left off realizing that all of my regrets were the direct result of my own design.  I kept coming back here and looking at the empty screen to blog further and I found myself slipping into a depression.  Depression = denial of apparent resistance.  Where does one go to avoid dealing with resistance?  To the Den of Depression of course.  It is in this den that one can wrap themselves in avoidance forever if that be the choice.  The den is a comforting abyss for awhile. 

In all honesty, when I left the computer on THAT day, I had the best of intentions to complete some of the things I found myself "regretting" and guess what, nothing happened.  I confronted some of the things on my list and just gave in to the feeling of being overwhelmed and came back to the computer and started to play.....bouncing hither and fro until I found myself deep in You Tube....being entertained and then, out of the blue I found myself watching a Louise Hay workshop.....once piece at a time.  Back to the basics.  No accident.  I sent the intention to create a shift and boom, there it was.  I was taken back to the basics.  Back to seriously uncovering the hidden patterns in my conciousness that are generating the re-creation of my current never ending experiences. The outward manifestations of inner conflict.  AND I am accutely aware of my lack of self esteem and belief that I deserve the life that I dream of.  Yep, back to basics.

Let me tell you about some seemingly silly incidents over the holidays.  Let's talk talk furniture.  I am a CraigsList junkie and I love the freebie stuff.  Well, I have been wanting to get a few things and just put it out there.  A gorgeous sofa and loveseat and a second tv were among the things I wanted.  I responded to a local ad and guess what............my absolute dream livingrooom set appeared.  Now here is the problem....I put it out there and when the Universe delivered....I didn't allow.  How is that for getting cold water in your face.   It gets better.  I was thrift shopping with a friend yesterday and this man comes into the store with a truck full of furniture and tries to give it to the thrift shop.  His parents furniture and they were "downsizing" to a care home.  The thrift shop has no room for it so they turn it away.  The man actually asked if anybody wanted to look at it (and he would deliver because it was already in a Budget truck) and I just kept my mouth shut!  I wanted to say, "may I please have the opportunity to look at the pieces" but I kept mouth shut.  So, twice in one week the Universe tried very hard to deliver my request and twice I did not allow the gift.  I guess I could be really pissed about the whole situation but I am choosing not to be.  I am choosing to go back to the basics and deal with my "deserving" issues using the Louise Hay workshop I downloaded.  Back to basics.

That is not the only incident that occured.  I ran into a casual friend at the thrift store that I briefly worked with but who has moved in a different direction since then.  She is now teaching based on Abraham-Hicks, but, get this, we went to grade school together in a city 4,000 miles from here.    So here we are, in the thrift store, really finally connecting with each other and talking about how we got to where we believe what we believe after "running into each other" for about three years post working together.  Boom, it finally set in that it was time to stop running into each other and start connecting with each other.  

Oh my dear Michelle, you reflections list has been a miracle worker.  Sorry for not actually "finishing" it but 2010 is not far off.  Please know how transformational that little list is in my life.

Stay tuned for my adventures in basic allowing. 

Thank any being who is taking the time to read,
Cara Leah